I'm back!
There are so many things happened. I thought I can fix it all but I know that I can't fix it all. I can't change the current situation. Some things I can't erase, no matter how hard I try. Everything happens for a reason, and I don't understand whats going on now. I'm totally confused.
I'm trying to keep it together with a smile on my face and my head held high. The fake smile may be there. But the tears aren't far be hide. I may say I'm alright. But I may be lying too. The truth is, I'm dying... from the inside
I know that I have everything I need and want, yet there's still something missing. Every day I smile. Every night I cry. In between there's so much pain I wonder how I've managed to bear it at all.
Sometimes I need to hold on to something. Sometimes I want to let go, But sometimes its harder to decide which to do. I wish that the hurt and pain from the past would just up and disappear because I am sick of having to relive the memories and sadness of it.
Sometimes... the deepest love can turn into the darkest hate...
Sometimes I just want to forget the rules, follow my heart and see where it takes me.
Sometimes I wish my heart had a off button... not because I don't want to care anymore but because I'm tired of all the pain its causing. I am tired of feeling this way.
At this point I can say that my mind is telling me to stop, but my heart still doesn't want to... I wish that he could see how much he hurts me. It is the hardest choice to make between what's RIGHT & what's EASY.
When you choose EASY, things go WRONG. When you choose what's RIGHT, things get HARD.
Patience is really a VIRTUE. It takes a lot of will power and effort to restrain myself.
